Jack of all Days

Today is special time in the summer for fathers and daughters of all ages to spend time together in the beautiful weather. Why a holiday? Our society emphasizes the importance of mother-daughter relationships more than father-daughter relationships. But father’s play an important role in the lives of their daughters. Experts say that fathers generally have as much or more impact as mothers do in the following areas of their daughters’ lives:

• achieving academic and career success—especially in math and science
• creating a loving, trusting relationship with a man
• dealing well with people in authority—especially men
• Being self-confident and self-reliant
• Being willing to try new things and to accept challenges
• Maintaining good mental health (no clinical depression, eating disorders, or chronic anxiety)
• Expressing anger comfortably and appropriately—especially with men

“While the father provides the role model for his son, he also provides a blueprint for the man his daughter will choose to marry,” says therapist Ellen Terich who runs the website FamilyWisdom.com. “Over the 20 years I worked as a therapist I observed how difficult it was for many young girls to choose good men to date - and ultimately to marry - when they did not have a close relationship with their dads.”

Terich goes on to say, “It is the father who first teaches a young girl what to expect from a man. If he’s strong and protective, she’ll look for strength. If he’s also loving and generous, she’ll look for that. She won’t tolerate selfishness and irresponsibility. On the other hand, if he’s an alcoholic, she may gravitate to men who use substances, and if he’s violent, she may unconsciously pick an abuser.”

Dads and Daughters (DADS) is a grassroots organization of fathers who believes in the importance of fathers. Its mission is to provide tools to both strengthen father-daughter relationships. The DADS philosophy is captured in ten “Tips for Fathers with Daughters,” one of which is to get physically active with girls, such as playing sports together or taking a walk together. This has been proven to result in happier, healthier daughters—and just as important, happy, healthy dads.